Religion vs What's Right

Heavy topic today.

The LDS church, a few days ago, released a statement denouncing discrimination of individuals based on sexual orientation, etc, LGBT... for short.

In one statement, it is mentioned that "The Western democracies are based on religious principles, and people who've lost sight of that and who can't credit the importance of individual religious conscience or the free exercise of what our conscience leads us to believe, they are poorer in understanding our civilization and in understanding people of religious faith."

Which sounds great except I'd like to argue that point just a little.

I believe that freedom of religion is designed to allow you to practice your religion. It entitles you to go to church on Sunday and/or put a cross on your front door. It was created to give you the freedom to practice your religion in your home or your place of worship.

Not in Congress.

It does NOT entitle you to sanctify laws restricting the freedom of gays to marry or asking the Supreme Court to give you an exception to providing birth control.

While the LDS church is saying they supported passing laws that did not allow gays to marry because it goes against their beliefs and are now saying that does not excuse discrimination, they are creating a double standard.  Is it not discrimination to support laws that give you different rights than someone else?  On a base level, not supporting gay marriage IS discrimination!

I don't feel that a church should be required by law to perform a gay marriage, but I also don't think any religious figures have the right to tell their constituents how to vote - to make them think God somehow spoke to them and told them to take away rights of others  -  which, by action - gives those church members permission to condemn another's lifestyle.

You can't have it both ways.

As for the birth control issue, that made me angry because if you are a publicly traded company, you should not be treated with religious freedom.  Hobby Lobby is not a church.  You might go to church on Sunday, but you are not God's Employers when you hire people to work at your company.

Again, you can't have it both ways!  You want to be publicly traded?  You have to follow the laws of the land.  Frankly, it was completely ignorant.  I get the idea of not wanting to condone birth control, but do they have ANY CONCEPT of how often it is prescribed for health reasons?  I almost bled to death because od issues with my uterus.  The birth control helped, but did not solve it in my situation, but hundreds of thousands of women who don't have sex, let alone those who are married and don't want another kid right away, use it to control pain, bleeding that can lead to anemia and a plethora of other health problems, and all kind of other issues.

The Inevitable. Death and Taxes!

I had most of our paperwork so I figured why not start our taxes?  I put it all together, got calculations, figures... I own my own business (Avon) and have to fill out a lot for that, then there are the simpler things; husband's W-2, Student Loan, deductions, etc.  All finished except my last W-2 from my temp agency job.

It finally came.  I input the info.  I made a whopping $2800 and paid $55 taxes withheld.  It reduced our refund by $400.

Yeah, that makes sense.  We are a  less than $50,000 a year household (by a hair), so $2800 should totally reduce our refund by $400.  Keep in mind, this means if I had not worked that job at all, we would be getting a $1600 refund.  That kind of pisses me off.

Outlines

Like query letters, outlines are a necessary evil of writing. Frankly, I still don't have the hang of it.  I know I was supposed to learn it in school, but I always just researched the information, then wrote my essays, checked spelling and grammar, and turned it in.  I didn't have bad grades.  What was my incentive to waste time on an outline?

Now I find I write myself into corners all the time.  Why?  Because I hate to outline.

Can you blame me?  I sat down to start an outline on a new novel which is not completely conceived at this point.  I thought starting an outline might help me fill out the rest of the idea.

Instead I typed this:

Reading Tarot in a Cabaret

The filthy club’s lights danced brightly off their targets leaving the rest of the room dark.  The only sign of other humans came from their laughter, clapping, and boisterous cheers, yet she could see him and knew instantly that her life would change drastically.

When a tarot reader turns the card of death, it does necessarily mean a physically death.  Despite the ominous, demonic image which stared through the soul of the person whose card were being read, it indicates a deep transformation of soul, love, employment, or spirit.

No, the card with the foreboding word Death written across the top of it did not mean someone had to die.  Perhaps it was the Emperor or the Priestess that had been turned who were actually responsible for the fact that someone had to die in order for someone else to live.

And I would frankly rather explore that than to write a stinky old outline.

Outlines SUCK.

That is all.

Things I Don't Understand about Web Hosting...

1. They have no interest in loyalty - Pretty much all web hosts offer a great introductory rate.  You can get a year for $1 a month, but after 12 months, you pay full price.  That means every year, it's much cheaper to change your host than to stay where you are.  Even with transfer fees it has saved me hundreds.  It's just a big pain in the ass.

2. Their discounts are not useful - Let's say you want to pay for 36 months.  Hey, we'll still give you a deal!  Do 36 month commitment and we'll only charge $3.49 a month.  Yes, but that means paying 2.49 a month more than I have to for the first year because they don't let you do 1 year at $1/mo, then the next 2 years at $3.49 a month.

3. Their comparisons are ridiculous - Several hosts will put up a comparison chart of why they are better than comparable hosts.  The thing is, if you excel in one area, you fail somewhere else and the same goes for your competitors.  The only people who care about some of the things you offer are web developers and corporate web gurus who actually run web pages from their own servers and don't need your hosting limitations.  The only people who care about your other features are the ones who can get them free through weebly and wordpress.  If I just want to build web pages for indie artists, small charities with tiny budgets, and personal web pages, you're all the damn same.  

I might as well save my pennies, pay the $1 a year, and then switch service next year because none of you want me to stick around.  If you did, you would offer discounts every year or give me a deal for purchasing more right now rather than offering me small amounts for a year of service and then hiking the prices to what others might consider "cheap", but I consider a lot because these pages are not making enough money to support $150 investments.

If it was $3.49 a month for one year, $2 for a 2 year, and $1 a month for a three year commitment, that would make sense.  Or even if you gave me $7 for one year, $5 for 2 and $3.49 for three, I would take it.  I will not take $3.49 for 36 months when $1 a month for the first year is available.  Frankly, it's the principle of the thing.  You want my $$ to keep coming in?  You reward me for loyalty!

I Don't Need Friends. I Have Friends as a Favor to Them...

In the last two weeks I've made plans with a bunch of friends.  Four times I've been cancelled on because they are "not feeling well."  This is a vague excuse that anyone can use at any time and I'm just supposed to say "Aw.  Feel better!" But I'm pretty sick of it.  One person has had a chronic illness and it's legit so I, theoretically, am not allowed to be annoyed by those cancellations.  Another friend was going to spend five seconds fixing a necklace for me which was supposed to be a Christmas gift, then she turned it into a "girls night" then she wasn't feeling up to it so I could come another day... except Christmas was only a couple of days away... and I was just wanting five damn minutes.

I actually get this a lot.  They want to hang out, we make plans, then the last minute, "I don't feel well."

Yeah, it's cold and flu season.  Yeah, I'm the fat person so according to all the skinny people using health as an excuse to JUDGE ME, I should be the one getting sick all the time, yet I'm the one getting ditched constantly.

Maybe I'm no fun to be around.

That's fine with me.  It's actually sort of in the design.  I don't like people and I don't need friends so if I'm no fun to be around, stop trying to make plans with me in the first place!

I find things to do.

I'm not a sad and lonely case.  I'm actually quite happy on my own.  See "introvert" as opposed to "shy".  Reference Hermit in the dictionary.

But fuck all.  I am so sick of "I'm not feeling well," as a reason to ditch your friends ALL THE TIME.  Suck it up once in a while or just stop making plans.  How much of it is real and how much is psychological?

Today I just have had it for the last time because the thing is, now these people are going to come back later and say "Hey, let's do something!"

But I don't really want to make plans with you.  I want to make plans that rely on the only person I can count on.  Myself.

Kids and technology

Why Steve Jobs Didn't Let His Kids Use iPads

Go read that.

It's a common theme these days and this article, amongst others, are blowing up around the internet and in the real world.

I've got parents saying they think they've got it right because their kids have basic cell phones, shared computer, and limits on their game system.  I've got another parent who takes my kid's cell phone away when she goes to play at her friend's house and, by the way, has never given me her phone number, doesn't have a land line and therefore isn't listed in the phone directory.  I've got someone else near me who says she doesn't mind having no cell phone or cable tv because it makes her kids be more creative, but when someone bought her a tablet, she immediately started a share plan so her kids could use it and be out of her hair.

THEY ARE ALL WRONG!

I want those parents who think they are superior for keeping "technology" from their kids to ask themselves whether or not their kids are ever going to drive a car or if you'll expect them to ride a horse and then ask themselves if they are really as superior as they think.

Look, if someone doesn't want a smart phone, that's their choice.  I feel like in modern society, it's okay to accept use of a cell phone.  After all, the pay phones all over town have been taken out and many places have policies specifically against using their business phone.  (Don't believe me?  Start asking at every business you go into.  Several of them have a specific company policy regarding this.)  Cell phones are expensive, but the alternatives we had in the past are gone.  Previous to phones, the worst thing that happened was a run away horse so our family had less worry about us dying if we disappeared for two hours.

The fact is, kids need to learn to balance technology with life.  Why do we use that word anyway?  The assembly line designed by the 'great and powerful' Ford is a type of technology.  It's our little portable devices we're discussing here and just like the assembly line, they will change everything we do from now until the apocalypse so best we get on board with understanding that it is more than an outlet to play Candy Crush.

It's sort of like teaching manners to a three year old.  Lots of people choose not to do it because "a kid is a kid!" but in reality, you are doing them a disservice.  How do you think they will learn manners if you don't teach it to them?  Teach them the importance of these devices, but also teach them when to put it away.  They will be much better adults if they don't think it's an all or nothing deal.  You're trying to control their every movement and frankly, kids who are overly controlled don't learn how to manage anything and are crippled adults.  These new adults aren't computer addicts because their parents let them be on the computer all the time.  They are addicts because no one taught them to set goals, limits, leave the games until the work is done.

Parents of the most recent generation were very busy and just wanted their kids out of their hair.

Look at my kid, okay?  At thirteen, I don't push the limits of her electronic use very much.  Why?  Because when she was younger, I made her earn her computer time. I waited to get her a cell phone until she was old enough to be running off with friends on her own (not play dates or babysitting where I'm there or there is a babysitter who can make emergency calls) and we waited to get her a cell phone until she had proved herself to be trusted and responsible.

Don't get me wrong.  When we sit down to dinner as a family, I sometimes have to remind her to put her phone away, but she does it immediately and we usually sit around talking after the meal.  She gets on the computer and we lose her for a few hours, but that happens about once a month.  Other than that, she plays lacrosse, goes outside to practice, plays her guitar, and hangs out with friends.

Yeah, she listens to music a lot on her iPod.  I listened to it a ton in my room on a tape deck.  I watched too much TV because I didn't have friends... not the other way around.  She has lots of friends so she has little interest in playing video games all night.  She actually has access to the Wii by herself, but she never plays it.  We have a PS3, too and she plays it for about 40 minutes when we are out for a walk, then turns it off for family time when we get home.

She has no siblings, you see, so it's a little harder to say "Hey, go entertain yourself."  Kids with siblings aren't entertaining themselves.  They are entertaining each other.  IMO, this will make them extra dependent on another for their happiness when they are older.  It's why some people jump into bad marriages.

We have used the iPhone to download study aides and reminders for a kid who has trouble remembering stuff and who does lots of research for school classes.  She's independent in her work, but we're always here to help.  Instead of doing things for her, we give her the tools to do it herself.

It's cool if you want to keep your kids from these devices.  Just stop thinking you've done something "right".  No, not "right", just "different".